I have a dream



I’ll keep this uncharacteristically brief, and characteristically incoherent.

I get weird dreams often. I don’t know if it’s something in the water or if my brain decides to be its most creative at night because it knows I’ll forget in the morning. Almost as if it is ashamed of what it did like a bad dog, or unsure like a nervous child offering a finger painting over with jaded trepidation to critical parents.

Through Fine Art school it was Fine to ‘do’ creativity any way you saw fit, but every week there were group critique sessions, where everyone would rip apart your work and tell you it was shit. And how it was shit. It’s debilitating and heart-wrenching seeing something you created, born and moulded by your beautiful brain, get beaten around the ring and you’re unable to throw in the towel; left standing to nod with perfect pertinent politeness as appropriate before the Fine Art Critic bunch. The kind who sip expensive wine while they look at art – murmuring “I will break you”. The kind who call anyone who doesn’t like Rothko paintings a philistine, who don’t even deserve to look upon art.

So maybe because of art school my brain has become the beaten dog, preconditioned Pavlovianly to fear creative thoughts unless they were thoughts good enough to keep their defences up enough to last a few rounds of critique. Adrian!

So basically I now keep a dream journal so I don’t forget any creative thoughts. I lied about this being brief, so I’ll wrap it up. I had a dream I wrote a children’s book about a boy who invents a biological shrink ray gun. He uses it to shrink his dog Bessy (notably a Great Dane) to fit in his pocket. Before long he does this to more and more animals before he creates world peace and is elected President of the World. What kind of world wouldn’t have global peace if people could have dog sized elephants for pets? Or a Shoulder Tiger. Those would be a thing. So I’m going to actually start to write and illustrate this and get it in the ring. Ding! Drool.

Jonathan Webb   Junior Art Director

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